The Blue Something
by LabbySidhe
Summary: As Edward stalked his way through the dreadfully long corridor, he bumped into a something. A blue something. Warnings: language & hints of yaoi. Note that this is an older story of mine.


**The Blue Something**

By: LabbySidhe (old pen name was Arsenic Dimentia... sorry!)

**Warning(s)**: language (though it could be worse), and a dash of yaoi. This is only a short, so don't expect too much.

**Disclaimer**: I don't own Full Metal Alchemist; it belongs to VIZ Media, Hiromu Arakawa, and the like. I'm just... torturing Edward for a little bit, 'kay?

**Summary**: Ed goes on a little trip to deliver his report... only to discover something horrid.

"Goddamn reports..." grumbled Ed; today was not his day. As he stalked his way through the dreadfully long corridor (as it was obviously against him, in a dimensional manner), he bumped into a something. A blue something. Cursing under his breath, he attempted a lift of the head, but seeing that the blue something was carrying a plant pot, he honestly couldn't tell who the something was. The plant itself was rather ugly, and Edward could only imagine what stood behind it.

He turned, quickly, and tried to run, but nearly froze once he heard a (if slightly muffled) voice.

"Izzat you, Fullmetal? ...Listen, I need a hand here, and the rest of the office is being a total pain in the ass and not helping... hey, you there? Hello?"

The alchemist shook himself from his slight fault and returned to his original plan of running like hell. The blue something groaned in protest, wishing someone would help him with the stupid thing.

After slowing to an ill-timed stop, Ed fell flat on his face in a pile of inconveniently placed garbage. Coughing and sputtering, he got up, and then dusted himself off out of habit. Though he wouldn't admit it to anyone, let alone himself, he was spooked pretty easily. For some reason, though, his flight response never took effect if Al tried to scare him, which was rare in itself.

In the end, after much debate over whether to try going back inside the haunted house (in other words, a building in Central), he decided he was really much better off just trying again tomorrow. After all, the blue something wouldn't be too mad, would he?

The next day, once the young alchemist had finished having paranoid (but strangely fitting) dreams about talking plant pots and the like, and had woken up feeling very fuzzy indeed, only to wind up brewing an entire batch of Himalayan tea while humming sweetly to himself, he left for his new mission: to approach the blue something and hand to it the report.

Upon arrival, Edward couldn't help but take note of the dozens of plants lying around. This only fueled the fire, however, and his legs' motions steadily became faster. He eventually made it to the room in the very back (frankly, he was more than starting to loathe these hallways), where the blue something lie. Just as he was about to storm into the damn place, he became aware of the slight draft coming from the cracked door. He quietly pushed it open ever so gradually, until at last he was staring at the most marvelous blue ass he'd ever seen. Wait, no. It was Roy. Colonel. The Elusive Bastard. Then again, he was in a pink apron.

What...? An apron? _Pink_?!

Edward couldn't stop staring. Not only was Roy Mustang in a pink apron, he looked hot in it. Very hot, indeed.

The Colonel finally finished adjusting the plant he had been doubled over, and attempted a go at standing. Back cracking furiously in the process, he proceeded to turn around, and immediately a smirk formed on his irresistibly handsome face.

"Why, Fullmetal! How nice of you to notice my ass."

Ed's face heated up and about turned blood red, despite the fact that all of his blood was somewhere else, much, much lower. He grunted in response because he really couldn't think of anything coherent to say, much less squelch. He threw the report at the blue (and now, pink!) bastard as soon as he pulled it out of his handy briefcase, and activated his flight response, leaving behind a completely baffled Roy amongst a few scattered report papers.

Later that day, once Roy got around to checking the report that had been chucked at him, he was surprised to see that the papers were completely blank.


End file.
